Just keep breathing

Every day I am confronted with the consequences of cancer. For everyone who thinks it's gone now, everything is back to normal: no unfortunately not. Maybe it's a new normal. One in which I am aware of my mortality. Where I know that nothing in life is self-evident. But also in which I notice the consequences of surgery and radiation every day. Sensitivity in my neck, a thyroid gland that is not working properly, not being able to make all movements with my head because of a physical limitation due to the surgery. A few weeks ago I noticed that I regularly have the feeling that my medication is getting stuck in my esophagus. From the moment I noticed that, I started paying attention and also thinking about whether I suffer from more often. That indeed turns out to be the case. For some time now I have had increasing problems with swallowing food. Especially harder or drier food. But I also notice more and more that there seems to be something in my esophagus. One of the possibl...

 It's been a while since I've written. In itself it is a good sign. The CT scans look good every time so far and my thyroid levels are good too. The physical fatigue is still there and in the last conversation with the pulmonologist he indicated that this occurs often and that some deal with this for the rest of their lives. For the first time since my diagnosis I managed to go on holiday to Scotland again. We have been looking forward to it and the weather was wonderful! One of the goals I had was standing on top of Arthur's Seat. I've written about it before. Shortly after I was diagnosed, a friend suggested that what was growing in me should be named Arthur. That helped me so much to put it into perspective and give it a place. Arthur's Seat was already a wish, but after that it had an even greater meaning. When I tested positive for Corona at the end of the first week of our holiday in Scotland, I was disappointed. Surely this wouldn't ruin my challenge? I...